Disclaimer: NO naysayers or pessimists were harmed in any way during or before the course of writing this article

Pacing in the corridor uneasily, head bowed in deep contemplation for a minute then turned skywards asking the powers that be “Why?” Then next moment mind veers towards the fact that we didn't give up then suddenly gets pulled back to reality that we did not get the job done and lost. All this felt like I was a ship travelling through high waters; up and down, left and right swerving about wildly never knowing whether it’s going forward or just standing there. To ease some pain I decided to write this down.

Dejection, despair, disgusted and devastated are among the few words that come to my mind (only a few to keep this short n simple). This plethora of words is stemming from a single event and probably a single emotion too. All this inside of me or for that matter every fan/supporter (read whichever word you like) is a direct consequence of the ill fated match against a club from London who prize themselves on defensive football (to each his own).

After a few chocolates and lots of music I began to think a bit clearly and then it struck my grief stricken mind n heart that if this is what a fan/supporter is going through what would it be for the players and coaching staff who were there on the field experiencing it firsthand. And then another lightning bolt out of the blue that how would our Captain Fantastic be right now, what’s going through his mind, Is he crying, Is he deflated or downright suicidal. I can only imagine what it would be like right now for him, No correct that, I cannot know anything that he has gone through the last few hours nor can anybody else for that matter (no matter who you are you simply cannot be inside someone else’s mind unless of course if you possess tech gifted by Aliens or someone who travelled through time). I can only guess as to what it might be and the only thing I can think of is, he feels a mixture of every sad emotion that has been spelt out in the dictionary. At least that’s the explanation I am giving myself.

The thought of our captain being broken did cross my mind after the mishap but it got buried down under the hope that we would turn it around in the next half of the game. Hope that we always walk with in our hearts. We all sincerely and truly believed that we would find a way through the defence which was akin to that of Russian mafia defending its territory in a gang war. And they were defending with large walls of concrete that had no visible weak points, it even had a trampoline like surface whatever you threw at it just came back. All they did was sit back and let us make mistakes, fortunately for them we eventually did which was all that they required and came for.

Moving on to matters of the emotional kind rather than those related to mind games. The day of the match did start off on a bad note for me personally being taunted by ‘fans’ who said “why do you wear scarf on such a hot day”. What and how to make them understand about the passion involved in this game is a question troubling me from long time. In this country football is considered to be “just kicking the ball” sport which is pretty much engrained in minds of the youth in this country, this belief is changing nevertheless but has a long way to go still. Meanwhile I have been successful to get my message through to a few friends who had an iota of reason and belief in them and a few have even started watching football regularly. And as the day wore on I met another naysayer (a regular EA Sports’ FIFA player) just hours before kick-off who categorically said “aaj to tumhari team haregi” which translates as “your team will lose today”. This statement shook my inner demons but I got hold of them because after all he was just another glory hunter (have no dearth of them here). There have been a lot many people taunting me that your club never won anything (really?) and my reply is a simple

 , they aren't even worth few breaths to me. This particular naysayer has been adamant on seeing my team, whatever drives him to that must be powerful, or maybe he just wanted to wipe that stupid grin on my face I had every Monday morning. Ultimately he did get his wish this Sunday, didn't he? All this was compounded by the fact that I had to miss kick-off and the first half an hour or so because I was ‘compulsorily’ called to a lecture on Spiritual matters. I sneaked away as quickly as I could, only to come and find that the opponents were more intended on ‘time wasting’ rather than playing a fact that I pointed out earlier.
The outcome of the match is very well known to us and it still is hurting us somewhere deep down. And then again I think what is going through HIS mind, the feeling inside us all even if combined cannot match his’. But if I have learnt anything over all these years of seeing him play is that he will never give up until there is even a little margin to gain ground over others. He will always channel that last bit of energy left in him to find that breakthrough needed. Of all the people we know he is the strongest and the most determined. We should stand by his side like we did at the game until he needs us. 

And say WE GO AGAIN.. WE GO AGAIN..WE GO AGAIN !!

PS : I skipped the word 'after' in the disclaimer :P